Sex
How do you know when you have a serious overbite?
How do you know when you have a serious overbite?When beaver starts tasting like shit.
Those clothes are very becoming on you
Boy: Those clothes are very becoming on you!Girl: Why thank you!Boy: Of course, if I was on you...I would becoming too!
No children yet
Mother: What seems to be the problem with you? You have been married three years and still no children. I had hopes of being a grandmother by now. Daughter: I just don't know, Mom! Billy tries all the time, it's just that I have a lot of trouble swallowing.
How does a women hold her liquor?
How does a women hold her liquor?By the ears.
Did you hear about the new course you can take at school?
Did you hear about the new course you can take at school?Yes, Intercourse....you go between periods and you are expected to come.
A guy approaches a prostitute on the street and asks her...
A guy approaches a prostitute on the street and asks her, "how much?" she replies, "$100 if I lay down and $75 if I stand up." He asks what the difference is, and she tells him, "it's my hairdresser's fee!"
There is this French couple, sitting up talking, when...
There is this French couple, sitting up talking, when the wife says to the husband that it was time he had a conversation with their thirteen year old son about the birds and the bees. So the father goes to his son's room and says "Son do you remember that session I arranged for you with mademoiselle Ginette ?" "Oh yes papa, I remember very well" says the son. "Well son it is time you knew that the birds and the bees do the same thing"
One day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decided...
One day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decided to get married.He was a man of the world and she was an innocent bride withno experience.On the first night of their honeymoon the couple washed upand started to get ready for bed. When they get into bed,they start exploring each other's bodies.Things are going fine until the bride discovers herhusband's penis. "Oh my", she says, "What is that?""Well, darlin", the cowboy says, "That's ma rope".\She slides her hands further down and gasps."Oh my goodness. What's them?" she asks."Honey, them's my knots", he answers.Finally, the couple begin to make love. After several minutes,the bride says, "Stop honey. Wait a minute".Her husband, panting a little, asks, "What's the matter honey?Am I hurting you?""No", the bride replies. "Just undo them damn knots.I need more rope!"
A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor...
A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor.He says "Doctor, I want to put her on the pill."The Doctor says "Why?!? Is she sexually active?"The guy says "Nah, she just lies there like her mother."Sent by soh
Man who goes to sleep with sex...
Confucious say: "Man who goes to sleep with sex on mind wakes up with solution in hand."
How do you know you're leading a sad life?
How do you know you're leading a sad life?When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Let's just be friends."
What is the definition of an overbite?
What is the definition of an overbite?When you go down on a girl and come up with a mouth full of shit.
How do you know when your girlfriend is too fat?
How do you know when your girlfriend is too fat?When she sits on your face and you can't hear the stereo
It has been determined that having sex before...
It has been determined that having sex before participatingin athletic activity, such as a marathon race, does notimpair the athlete's performance. In fact, men have knownand displayed this for centuries. After sex, they glanceat their watches and say, "Oops, gotta run!"
A guy meets a girl out at a nightclub and she invites him back...
A guy meets a girl out at a nightclub and she invites him back to her place for the night. Her parents are out of town and this is the perfect opportunity. They get back to her house and they go into her bedroom. When the guy walks in the door, he notices all these fluffy toys. There's hundreds of them, fluffy toys on top of the wardrobe, fluffy toys on the bookshelf and window sill, there's more on the floor, and of course fluffy toys all over the bed. Later after they've had sex, he turns to her and asks "So, how was I?" She says "Well ... you can take anything from the bottom shelf."
An old sailor goes to a brothel...
An old sailor goes to a brothel,where he chooses his girl and begins."How am I doing?" He asks."Three knots," she replies."Three knots? What's that mean?""You're not hard, you're not in,and you're not getting your money back."
What is pink and moist and split in the middle?
What is pink and moist and split in the middle?A grapefruit!
When a man takes off his pants in a hotel room...
When a man takes off his pants in a hotel room,what's the first thing to hang out?The DO NOT DISTURB sign!
Why is pubic hair curly?
Why is pubic hair curly?If it was straight, it would poke your eyes out.
Why is sex like money in the bank?
Why is sex like money in the bank?Because when you withdraw, you lose interest.Sent by Annette
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